Mourinho: Tactical Mastermind/The Death of Soccer

i love you, i really do.

i love you, i really do.

I was surprised listening to podcasts prior to the game this week  (Guardian‘s Football Weekly in particular) that Inter was being written off so casually. We saw enough in the first game to suggest that for every one of Chelsea’s actions, Inter could provide a suitable and equal reaction. (Cambiasso’s goal a perfect example.)

Watching tonight’s  game was painful at times. For every dive, episode of time wasting, act of amateur dramatics (cheating?) on Inter’s part had me wishing Mourinho would be standing close enough to the to touch line to take a deflected volley directly in the nuts from a Chelsea player (preferably from one of his adopted kids–Lampard, Terry, Drogba!).  For all the hyperbole and drooling by the  (mostly English)  media over “the special one”,  memories of the Celtic-Porto 2003 UEFA cup final came flooding back.  A final scarred by Mourinho’s tactics.  Martin O’Neil was quoted on the night as saying:

“I will probably get into trouble for this, but it was poor sportsmanship,” O’Neill said. “The rolling over, the time wasting.

Quiet, i'm working.

Quiet, i'm working.

“But they have beaten us, well done to them and it’s up to us to learn from this.

But Porto won, and Celtic lost. Inter won, Chelsea lost. Those at the sharp end live and die on results. Mourinho lives. Again. Not only did Inter have complete control over the game tonight, but they played it so that the Chelsea players were scared of their own shadows. They would not put a foot in for fear of the referee’s whistle. That’s Mourinho.  They were so tactically confused they barely one clean shot on goal. That’s Mourinho. Each Inter player has bought in to the Mourinho cause so much they do everything the man asks of them  (sound familiar Frank, John?). Eto was playing left wing when he scored. I’ll say that again, Eto was playing left wing. For every Chelsea action, Inter had a superior reaction. And this was in London!

There is something fascinating that a man, “the interpreter”, who spent so much time working under Bobby Robson is so polar opposite. Mourinho will do anything to win a game.  Not so Sir Bobby. And that’s not being sentimental. Sir Bobby Robson had a winning mentality. He’d chop his own arm of to win a game. But as his reaction to     Maradonna’s first goal in the 1986 quarter finals showed, he “won’t do that.” I don’t think i can say the same for Mourinho.

My work here is done.

My work here is done.

There’s something in this result that sits uneasy to fans of The Beautiful Game. There’s something in this result that shows you just how good Mourinho is.

I think Andy Gray on Sky Sports said it best. “If you are going to be high maintenance, you better be good. And my word, is he good.”

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All Said and Done?

David Beckham leaves the field injured for A.C. Milan.

All Said and Done? Maybe, Maybe Not.

I’ll leave it to others to thrash out the ramifications of Beckham’s injury to England’s World Cup hopes. All i’ll say is that, as a footballer and as a footballing role model, Beckham will be missed.

In an era where many footballers were more concerned with earning more money than the bloke next to him, or even refusing to play if not in their preferred position, I will remember Beckham as the 34 year old who trained, travelled, and gave up everything of himself to play for his national team. What i give credit to Beckham for is his love, and respect, for the game. Away from the circus that often surrounds him, the man gave his all to whatever team he played on. I heard a very sensible comment today from a pundit who said that the true weight of Beckham’s absence will be seen in the comments by his fellow professionals and team mates.

We might not even get to hear it, but I think that there will be more than a handful of England players who will be gutted for the lad and will mention that his presence will definitely be missed.

It was a pleasure to watch him, see for yourself here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=adYgHunQEl0

and here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=Gig9p0kGA1o&

and here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r52GsXcLSrE

and here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=MR5MjT5deNY

And of course, he did what every little boy in England always dreamed of here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0GESlaVNdE

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Like A Really Persistent And Annoying Zombie …

… this blog just refuses to die.

like this zombie, our blog refuses to die.

Like this zombie, our blog refuses to die.

So (for now) we’re back. Enjoy it (while it lasts).

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The Winners, The Losers …

Since i last posted, here are just some of the faces that have set their own destiny on football’s ever-slippery pole.

Taxi pleeeeaassse!!!!

King Kev illustrates just how much he loves Mike Ashley

King Kev illustrates just how much he loves Mike Ashley

Guys, the goal is THIS WAY!!!

Guys, the goal is THIS WAY!!!

Anton, youre supposed to be defending ibthis/i/b bloody goal!

Anton, you're supposed to be defending this bloody goal!

OK, Im off. Wait til Elton hears about this!

OK, fair enough, I'm off. (Wait 'til Elton hears about this!)


A Director of Football can work, dammit!

A Director of Football can work, dammit!

For every down, there’s an up …

Im your man guvnor, trrrifffic.

I'm your man guv'nor, trrrifffic.

Whats wrong with a cockney mafia?

What's wrong with a cockney mafia?

Who said its grim up north, mate? Why Aye Man!

Who said it's grim up north, mate? Why Aye Man!

We’re only a few months into the season, so who ‘s to say the top lot won’t replace the bottom lot by season’s end. Stranger things have happened, you know?

Did i miss anyone out? Who would you have added to this lot?

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It’s Back …

For how long, who knows, but COTAHT is back.

The Bitch is Back.

The Bitch is Back.

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Where Did It All Go Wrong (Right)?

Depending on the color of your shirt, the last few days of EURO 2008 have been the best/worst in some time. You are either proud of your worthy underdogs or still in shock that your team picked the wrong time of the tournament to be average.

Just what was in the Portugese/Dutch/Croatian pre-game water? Why were they so off form? The Dutch couldn’t put three passes together at times. The Dutch, for God’s sake! Did the Croats underestimate the Turks? How could they after that Czech game?

Despite, or perhaps because of, the upsets this weekend the tournament continues to be one of the most exciting of recent memory. And be sure, this is no Euro 2004, where a boring but organized underdog 1-0′d their way to the championship. Turkey attack your goal like an irritating terrier that just won’t stop yapping at your door. Russia pass, move, and smile their way past opponents. They are clinical in their approach (if not in their finishing) and seem to have a bottomless fitness tank.

But today is Sunday. That Sunday. Spain v. Italy. No underdog today. Just two fanatical footballing nations going at each other (well, Spain will be). Two very different styles, two very difference coaches.

COTAHT has learned that making predictions is a dicey game to play, and ultimately not a successful one. But what the hell, Spain 3 – Italy 0. Put that on your bread and toast it.

But who’ll be dancing in the fountains this evening? Check here or here after the match, depending on the color of your shirt.

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Put That Loofah Down, Jens!

Who were we at COTAH to tell the big dodgy German ‘keeper when to bathe. Stop the taps! Put away the soap! Return those flip-flops to your locker Jens, ‘cos the German’s march on!

A thoroughly deserved win against a Portugal side that only got going when provoked. Interesting to note that the majority of the Portugese starting XI were coming off of a 8-day rest. The Germans played only 72hours earlier than today.

Ronaldo was not a factor, although he rarely received a decent early pass when he was trying to get the play going. Ricardo was a joke. In short, the Portugese were a pushover, literally (see Ballack’s version of the gentle touch, below).

Sure, they put the Germans thru the mangle for the last ten minutes, but don’t turn up late for the dance lads ‘cos your bird’s most likely already left with your best mate.

The German’s advance (insert your own trite joke here), the Portugese go home.

I’m off to scrub Jen’s back …

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Dripping Like a Wet Melon … (quarter finals time)

Girl Eating Slice of Watermelon (1555R-307582 / bxp211708)

The quarter finals are here, and every match-up makes the mouth water. Well, the Turkey-Croatia game will be good, at the very least.

Germany-Portugal, Turkey-Croatia, Holland-Russia, and Spain-Italy has a little something for everyone. Each game promises much and, fingers crossed, will deliver. 

This is definitely ‘sqeaky-bum’ time, but in a refreshing way, winning in this tournament seems to have been more about how well you can attack than how well you defend. Spain, Holland, Russia, Croatia, and to a lesser extent Portugal, have all shown that a positive approach to the game (meaning let’s go forward and score as many goals as we can) will bring rewards. This is marvellous to see in a day and age where many ’big teams’ have resorted to playing with a single striker and a packed defence/midfield. Winning ugly, i think it’s called, but is it the beautiful game? That’s up for argument. 

So on to today’s game, Germany-Portugal. Can Ronaldo live up to his increasingly large reputation as the current world’s best player (with the dodgiest haircut)? Will Podolsky keep on hammering them in? Will Germany’s entertainingly dodgy keeper ensure an early bath for his side? All questions, no answers yet, but i’d get the taps running now, Jens, if i were you.

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Yellow Submarine (has great big hole in it)

Sweden out. The team which always makes it to the qualifying rounds of every  tournament were a shadow of their former selves. Jlungberg, Larsson et al looked a step behind and a yard back from the nimble Russians.  Sad to see “Henky” exit without a goal, but at 36, playing in elite international tournaments is beyond him (and a few others too). See you lads, good luck when you get home! (to a merciless Swedish press!) 

But as Sweden were bad, Russia were exceptional. Quick, slick, and mercilessly naive, they attack at every chance and play the type of one touch football that has sportscasters drooling (when it’s Brazil).  hiddink_toch_vervolgd_voor_belastingfrau.jpg
Lucky Guus has (yet again) turned a very ordinary national team into genuine contenders. And as i  mentioned in an earlier post, their key players are now turning up. If they play to their potential, and seize their moment, great things could happen.  If they choke, it’s one ‘dreadful flight’ and they’ll be ’Back in the U.S.S.R.’

 The Russians meet the Netherlands on Saturday, which surely is the purists’ pick of the quarter final matches, no? Either way, it promises to be a cracker.

P.S. Makes you wonder why this man has never been seriously considered for the English national team job, given his knack of making the proverbial silk purse from sows ears.

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Relentless Forward [Orange] Progress

Marco van Basten bonds with his team
“I love you boss, don’t change” …

Nine changes to the Dutch lineup and still a 2-0 victory over what has been seen to be quite a classy Romanian team. If you have not already, check out Van Persie’s goal in this game (see video’s to the right of this post). It’s a bit special. 

The color of this EURO trophy could will be Orange. Does anyone bet against this?

Oh yeh, now to the other match from today … ITALY WON, and still did not play very well. Sound familiar? I know, if i had a spare tenner (i don’t) it’d be on the Italians. France now must prepare for the new generation, because the current one is as worn as Ghandi’s Flip-flops. They huffed and puffed, but never looked like scoring. Except for Benzima’s irght-foot cracker, that is.

Italy now play Spain  (now that’s a cracker!). Holland play either Sweden or Russia.

 

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